Adulting is the WORST

So we're all getting older every fecking day but are we getting any wiser? I like to think that I've matured into a somewhat responsible adult after living in a different country alone however I've found many, many downfalls to being Miss Independent. Here are some of the worst things about adulting.

1. What happened to my 14 hour lie-ins? I used to stay up until 3 am on a school night (reading Harry Potter and Darren Shan) and now, well now I'm peeved with myself if I stay up past 1 am because I know I'll be tired and I'll wake up early because my stupid body clock craves Weetabix at 10 am every day. Stress.

2. Appointments- Does everybody have as many appointments as me? Why is there always somebody else to schedule an appointment with? That makes me have to think about what I'm doing another day other than today and I don't even know what day it is,

3. Canceling appointments- I now feel terribly guilty when I have wastefully taken up somebody's time so I have to make the dreaded call to tell them that I can't make it, along with a fabricated excuse while I lay on the couch eating jellies, reveling in my boldness...

4. Washing clothes- Why on earth did my mother never tell me that maintaining clean, ironed clothing is the biggest bane of life itself? I mean you have to really plan the whole thing out which refers back to my previous issue of having to make any future plans. And we've all done it, forgotten the washing in the machine for ages until they smell and you have to do it AGAIN! Or forgetting them on the washing line until they are sun-starched or soaked in the rain smell and you have to do the whole thing AGAIN.

5. Feeling like you are being exorcised when all you've done is drunk a few scoops with the lads. My body just hurts, like everywhere. There is no chance of doing anything in any way productive except balling up under the duvet, in complete darkness ( praise our Lord for black-out curtains) and slowing morphing into a vampire...

6. Metabolism; are you still there? Are you doing anything? Hello? It's quite shocking that never reached obese on the BMI scale with the amount of manure I consumed on a daily basis in the past when Mr. Metab was in full swing. Unfortunately, I now resemble the Michen man with the few spare tyres hanging out in the belly region. I can no longer enjoy McDonalds, Subway, 3 in 1s, Dominos etc. in the same way I did before university, which is shit 'cause they're lovely! And worst of all, I'm becoming concious of what I'm eating. I eat vegetables now, I fucking hate vegetables.

7. Maintaining a home in terms of paying bills, keeping it clean and buying groceries. I might as well be running a business with the amount of organisational skills it demands. The worst day ever is when you realise that you've run out of toilet paper after you've made a poo and you have to figure out what to do next. Mammy never leaves it run out.

8. Your health becomes important and you even get letters to remind you that you're getting old and you need to grow up. These come in the form of cervical smear reminders. It feels like you're sticking your finger in my belly button and I just don't like it. I also take note of the colour of my wee to make sure I'm properly hydrated, when did this become relevant in my life?

9. Watching people change, or equally not changing at all, is a very hard part of adulting. There also comes a sad day when you've realised that you've changed too and it's not the same as it was before because life is so difficult now and you have to leave some of them behind.

10. Talking about boring shite and formulating opinions about what is happening in the world. Last week, I found myself saying "Oh God, this weather is going to be terrible for drying clothes. What are we going to do?". Umm, why do I care?

So we all agree it's pretty shite right? If you're looking for help, you can call 1800-999-MAMMY. Other than I don't know, I'm still trying to figure it out!