Dear Diary

Hi all,

Been a while since I wrote on my blog but wanted to make an effort to do it for 2017. So, hello again!

What's new you ask? Well, I'm studying a Masters in Journalism in UL, love the campus but not the city. I miss Cork! Everyone's heart seems to lie in the city you first went to university. I'm back working in a local shop in Tipperary and teaching English in Limerick. College is great, I love being back in college now that I have my head half screwed on and actually understand the importance of it all. It's really enjoyable getting stuck into life on campus and I'm learning so much, it's great! People I've come across are legendary also.

 I'm trying to start doing more exercise, went to a class called 'Body Pump' during the week and couldn't walk for two days after it. The stairs were a real struggle and we all know the difficulty in trying to get on the toilet after some serious squats. Still, I will persevere! I'm back swimming too, love that. Only think that completely empties my brain for a while.

As per usual, I'm also trying to juggle an active social life on top of all the work I have. That's a major struggle. It seems my body is not, I repeat NOT, able to cope with hangovers anymore. Even worse than that is the crippling fear and anxiety I have after a serious stab at a good session. It's terribly depressing. I know I sound like an old hen talking but, I remember the days that I would stay out all night and get up for work at 9, no problemo. I have to allow for two days of pain after a little partying these days. What's the craic with that?

All these things include the fact that I'm just exhausted all the time. Is this what it means to be an adult? Am I old now? I feel like all this has happened since I reluctantly fell into the other side of my twenties. Or I just being paranoid?

"No," says my body.

I was thinking lately of naming that paranoid bitch in the back of my head. And she shall be called, Janet. I feel like its an appropriate name for an irritation. Sorry to any Janets out there, it's nothing personal. We all know a woman who is just always pointing out the negatives in EVERYTHING and just seems to revel in making you feel bad about yourself. Fear, paranoia, anxiety, vulnerability and negative emotions are the wicked formula which forms......Janet.

What else? I have plenty other crap going on in my brain these days too. As some of my friends could tell you, I do tend to get a little stressed when I'm busy. Although I actually thrive on being busy. Active body, active mind! So I've started back counseling again too which I'm happy about. It felt great to have someone to just let it all out with. It's relieving but it can be hard too. It's really hard if you decide that you actually what to tackle the dung deep down. It stinks down there!

Anyway, that's a positive note to end with. All steps towards the best version of me I hope!

Peace out y'all!

Amy

P.S.
Recommended viewing for the week: Medication Nation on RTE, essential viewing!